民国女子宋清如 - 小众知识

民国女子宋清如

2013年01月27日 14:18:05 苏内容
  标签: 宋清如/朱生豪
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文/草白

众人知道宋清如是因为朱生豪。这位译莎才子在世的日子非常短暂,生前寂寂,死后成名,他的死亡颇具悲剧色彩,得的是当时的顽疾——肺结核,可以归之为积劳成疾,加上战争动乱,缺食少药,最终把命也搭上了。他说:饭可以不吃,莎剧不能不译。朱猝逝后,朱夫人宋清如可算是尽了心力,抚养幼子,出版遗作,把漫漫的一生交付给了他。

在嘉兴市区禾兴南路73号朱生豪故居门口,这对患难情侣身体相连,宋脸庞微侧,朱深情凝视,似在喁喁私语。他们双眸微闭,冥思、陶醉在某个久远的梦里,带着一种尊贵、宽容的气氛。似乎与这条尘土飞扬的禾兴路毫无关系。

这是本地雕塑家陆乐的作品。雕像的基座上有朱生豪给宋清如未曾发出的信:“要是我们两人一同在雨声里做梦,那意境是如何不同,或者一同在雨声里失眠,那也是何等有味”。

这两人生活于20世纪。宋清如的一生更是几乎横亘了整个世纪,她生于20世纪初,经历了战争、饥荒、政治运动,于20世纪末驾鹤仙去。命运把更多的寂寞与清苦都留给了女人。

人们知道朱生豪,是因为莎士比亚剧作,这个年轻的译作家把生命中最后的日子都献给了它。则宋清如呢,这个朱生豪背后的女人,当年的之江才女,她有过怎样的童年,她往日的生活到哪里去了,她的青春如何在时代的悲怆中得到升华?

当时间过去,容颜更改,凡人的躯体归于永恒的寂静,我们或许可以试着打探那一代女人如何通过黑暗、星空、暴风雨来寻找自我,在漫长的一生中面带微笑,悠远笃定,从而拥有与我们不同的魂灵。

宋清如生于1911年。与她同年出生的有萧红,比她稍早的有孟小冬、丁玲、林徽因、陆小曼等人,晚于她的有苏青、张爱玲、孙多慈等,这些民国女子大都心路坎坷,老照片中的形象是素色旗袍,布鞋,发式干净,表情娴雅。她们是旧时代的新女性,能断文识字,有远大抱负,但她们只是女性,暗夜中行走的人,无一例外都有一颗隐忍、丰沛之心。

宋清如出生于地主家庭,家境殷实,幼年接受私塾启蒙,及长进苏女中,向家里抗议“我不要结婚要读书”,于1932年如愿进之江大学,在之江诗会上认识嘉兴人朱生豪,有心灵碰撞。之后十年,战乱岁月,两人笔墨往来,互诉衷曲。朱生豪是她生命中的第一个男人,虽然她在家乡也有一门亲事,但对男方一无所知,也不想知。她的心思全在读书上,她是有“学校”情结的,从家乡读到外省,从私塾读到学院,连嫁妆也可以不要,并且认为大凡有出息的女子是不爱打扮的,真正是把读书当作事业来追求了。

那个时代,有读书情结的女性大有人在,可能几千年来被憋坏了,一旦爆发,像火山,挡也挡不住。出走,读书,读书,出走,梦魇似的,民国女性的身影在校园里穿进穿出。张爱玲的母亲黄逸梵在做了两个孩子的母亲后还要留洋,学绘画,习歌舞,小脚到阿尔卑斯山上滑雪,高跟鞋前塞满了棉花。

再看宋清如,她的求学经历也是险象环生,是宁愿不要嫁妆得来的,在态度强硬下才退的婚,好在家里还算开明,身体上没受什么大的磨折,心里的创痛却时刻折噬着她。

宋清如极具个性,初入校门的她就显示出独立不羁的一面,她说,女性穿着华美是自轻自贱,她还说,认识我的是宋清如,不认识我的,我还是我。

早年的宋清如

多么傲慢,一个女子竟然不要包装,不讲外貌,不在乎旁人评价,我行我素到这般。在当时,女性刚走出闺阁,个性被压抑久了,偶有一两个发出惊人之叹,实在不足为奇。

外面的天地果然开阔,宋清如不仅读书,还谈起恋爱来了。她遇见的这个人就是朱生豪,天性腼腆,讷言拙语,体育极差,是文弱的书生,聪敏的才子。

他们的恋爱可真长,足有十年,其中写信就写了九年,朱生豪的信写得可真好,情意真挚,缱绻缠绵。这位被朋友笑谑为“没有情欲”的才子,笔底多么丰盛、辽阔,即使不是当事的,但凡读信之人都会为之心动。

信纸上,朱的蝇头小字密密麻麻,如絮絮叨叨的孩子,有时这封信刚寄出,下一封又续上了。想到什么写什么,一句话也成一封信寄出,有的则唯恨纸张太薄,连签名的地方都无(小编注:朱生豪的情书简札请看这一篇《醒来觉得甚是爱你》)。

“我不是诗人,否则一定要做一些可爱的梦,为着你的缘故……我多么愿意自己是个诗人,只是为了你的缘故。”

“这里一切都是丑的,风、雨、太阳,都丑,人也丑,我也丑得很。只有你是青天一样可爱。”

“对于你,我希望你能锻炼自己,成为一个坚强的人,不要甘心做一个女人。”

“你的来信如同续命汤一样,今天算是活转过来了。 ”

“我们都是世上多余的人,但至少我们对于彼此都是世界最重要的人。 ”

“我卜了一下,明天后天都仍然无信,顶早星期四,顶迟要下个星期五才会有信,这不要把我急死吗? ”

“希望你快快爱上一个人,让那个人欺负你,如同你欺负我一样。”

“真愿听一听你的声音啊。埋在这样的监狱里,也真连半个探监的人都没有,太伤心。这次倘不能看见你,准不能活。”

这些信真挚、有趣、动人,是情书中的极品。一个被情爱折磨的男子之敏感、细腻、忧愁、怨怼跃然纸上。恋爱是苦差事,一颦一笑被另一个牵扯着,真是自己的身体自己做不得主啊。有意思的是那些称呼与署名,在别处没有见过,很有新意呢。请看朱对宋的称呼,什么“阿姊、傻丫头、青女、无比的好人、宝贝、小弟弟、小鬼头儿、昨夜的梦、宋神经、小妹妹、哥儿、清如我儿、女皇陛下”等,让人忍俊不禁。再看朱的信末署名,更是有趣得让人喷饭,什么“你脚下的蚂蚁、伤心的保罗、快乐的亨利、丑小鸭、吃笔者、阿弥陀佛、综合牛津字典、和尚、绝望者、蚯蚓、老鼠、堂吉诃德、罗马教皇、魔鬼的叔父、哺乳类脊椎动物之一、臭灰鸭蛋、牛魔王”等,看了这些,你能说朱生豪只是寡言无趣之人吗?这样的人,简直就是天生的恋爱高手。

朱生豪留给宋清如的信有三百余封。想必宋清如给朱生豪也写了相当数量的信,可惜朱在逃难时遗失了。这些信完全颠覆了朱生豪在同学及朋友中的形象,那么活泼、丰富,一种青春的气息从幽默与玩笑中迸发。

除了谈情说爱,议论诗文和作品交流也是重要内容之一,朱是宋的教师,不时指点她一二,这可能是当时颇为流行的恋爱形式,男女切磋学问,好学的女子自然对性灵与才学兼具的男子萌发崇拜兼爱慕之情。独立不羁的宋清如也不例外。

在两性关系中,书信往来是那个年代最让后世之人感受时代风流之处。写信在当时可能是无奈,分别是经常的,也是漫长的,慢腾腾的邮车给热恋的人捎去了慰安,也捎带了小小的烦恼,文字不比见面啊,总有辞不达意之处。书信年代的恋爱似乎总是如此,缓慢悠长,情节波折,却没有实质性的进展,总是在深夜灯下,孜孜不倦地写啊写,盼信时的心焦被收信的欣喜轻而易举地覆盖。整个恋爱进程在纸上可以极为神速,惊天动地,但见了面也只是淡淡的。

君子寡言,宋清如是欣赏的。但她只是暗暗地爱着,带有试探性质,迟迟不见实质的升华。两人都是有大气概的,要做大事情,不总是想着过二人世界,究其原因,除了时局动乱外,更重要的是他们的精神生活如此丰富,甚至当朱建议结婚时,宋违背常理地拒绝了。她可是想到了那门被退掉的亲事,还是觉得婚姻只是男女关系的恶俗升华?总之,宋的拒绝饶有深意,可见新女性的理性和志气,我和你好,不一定是以结婚为目的的,况且从爱情到婚姻的跨越是需要慎之又慎。

直到1942年,在他们苦恋9年之后,经旁人提议,便于世事及共同生活的考虑,才匆匆完婚。那年宋31岁,朱也有30岁,都是大龄青年了。一代词宗夏承焘为新婚伉俪题下八个大字:才子佳人,柴米夫妻。

宋清如与朱生豪的结婚照

婚后,朱生豪还是才子,一心沉浸在译莎事业中,对周遭世界完全不管不顾。可宋清如已不是什么佳人,只是辛勤的家庭主妇,帮工做衣,补贴家用,为一日三餐奔走。

董桥在《朱生豪夫人宋清如》一文中写道:有人准备写一本《宋清如传奇》,她听了说:“写什么?值得吗?”因为朱生豪吧。她答得简洁:“他译莎,我烧饭。”

其实,朱曾邀宋一起翻译莎剧,但被宋以英文程度不如朱而婉拒。她担忧耽误朱的翻译进程。所以,朱生豪在世时,宋清如只是扮着读者、校对者、欣赏者的角色。

连这样的角色也没扮长久,1944年12月26日午后,朱生豪病危,临终喃喃呼唤:“清如,我要去了。”朱生豪因肺结核等多症并发撒手人寰,留下孤儿寡母及未竟的译莎事业。

这一年,常熟女子宋清如才33岁,稚子则13个月。他们的夫妻生活只维持了两年。

我在当地晚报上见过一张宋与苏女中同学的合影,照片泛黄,却极为清晰,宋容貌清丽,幽雅娴静,气质在众人之上。而新婚合影照中的宋以短发亮相,脸庞秀丽,双眸含笑,真正是“楚楚身裁可可名”。

正当年华,容颜娟秀,却遭遇如此命运,漫漫人生将何以堪。一般女子,要么以死了之,要么沉沦了,这两样都是容易的。可宋清如不能这样,她身上是负有使命的,朱生豪给她留下31种、180万字莎剧手稿,未曾出版,还有他们的幼子,嗷嗷待哺。

一个人有了使命,就有了活下去的勇气。

宋清如的后半生似乎都在赶着做这两样事情:出版朱的译稿,抚养他们的孩子。她要替朱生豪活下来,她要做他没有来得及做的事,人生的风景她要替他一一看过,只为了有一天她与他在那永恒的寂静中,她要一一说于他听。

女子的情感实在古怪之极。一向豪奢惯了的陆小曼在徐志摩逝世后竟缟素终身。徐悲鸿的遗孀廖静文在徐去世时,年仅30岁,一辈子守护徐的遗产,虽然有过一段短暂的婚姻,但徐对廖的影响实在太大了,她的工作与生活都围绕着他而存在。亲自组建并一直担任徐悲鸿纪念馆馆长的廖说,每天我都在怀念悲鸿。

遗孀的身份,确实不那么轻松。日日生活在亡夫的精神光环里,别人再也进不了她的内心世界。在寂寞中苦熬,只靠回忆度日。

朱生豪去世后,宋清如一度很是清苦。除了照顾稚子朱尚刚,她把全部的精力都用在了工作上,但这些都不能安慰一个女人的寂寞,特别是一个心思细腻的诗人,她的情何以寄托?

那时候,作为翻译家的朱生豪几乎不为人知,他的译稿也是几年之后才获得出版。在朱生豪去世后,宋清如是有过结婚打算,并有过一段短暂情史,还生有一女。这一点很少被外人所知。宋清如在《常熟文史辑存》上发表回忆朱生豪的文章,编者在按语中说:“宋清如女士……四十多年来,抚养唯一的儿子成人。”讳莫如深为哪般,这究竟是一个怎么样的故事?

1949年,宋清如由朱生豪的母校嘉兴秀州中学调入杭州高级中学,是经之江同学骆允治的介绍,骆当时任这所学校的总务主任。进入杭高的宋清如,因此得到了骆的照顾。据宋清如当时的学生骆寒超回忆,宋生病不能上课时,也常常是骆允治给她代课。朱尚刚在《诗侣莎魂:我的父母朱生豪、宋清如》一书中说:“我记得有一段时间骆先生常常在课余和假日来看母亲……后来,母亲怀了孕,并且于1951年暑假回常熟乡下生下了我妹妹。”

宋清如生下女儿那年,四十岁。一个中年女人肯为男人生下小孩,并且是在未婚的情况下,这是需要勇气的。

为什么宋在诞下女儿后,最终又未与骆允治结婚呢。有人说是骆允治老家已有妻子,包办婚姻,但原配不肯离婚,宋很愤怒,一怒而走。真相怎样,无人能知。

或许她真的无法忘怀朱生豪,加之原本充盈的爱,已经被挥发殆尽了,这次她不想付出太多,没有名分,对宋清如来说是无法想象的。

事实是,宋清如此事不久就离开了杭高,调到杭师工作,不能说这与她的感情挫折全然无关。朱尚刚回忆说,母亲曾考虑过今后与骆走到一起来的事,但后来还是分手了,是什么原因她从来没有对他讲起过。

我想,在这段感情中宋清如是有伤害的,婚姻不成,却多了一个不明不白的孩子,以致几十年来一直讳莫如深。不是刻意隐瞒,只是不愿提及罢了。

总之,在这次受伤后,宋清如是彻底关闭了心扉,又返回到朱生豪的世界里,并且越走越深,再也出不来了。也是不想出来了。在那里她是安全的,一个男人把对她的依恋写在脆薄的纸页里,她通过重温来感受旧梦。

天才的光辉不会被长久地掩埋,朱的译稿很快由世界书局出版,全部整理校勘工作则由宋清如独自完成,她的心情因此稍稍宽慰了些。

可宋清如还是有遗憾的。朱生豪留下莎剧第四集六个史剧没译,临终的悔语如在耳畔,她要替夫完成遗愿,这个决心一下,自己先惊呆了。在此交代一句,朱在遗嘱中嘱胞弟文振来完成此事,可文振的译风明显与朱生豪不符,出版方并不满意,如此,才有宋清如的壮举。

在他生前,她只是他书稿默默的校对者和誊写者,是他背后站着的女人。她愿意牺牲自己“琼枝照眼”的文采,只是淡淡地一句“他译莎,我烧饭”便打发了,可这一次,她却要来真的。她出于何种考虑?真实的动机往往简单得让人吃惊,她不过是替夫还愿罢了。

一个人死了,那未竟的事业由另一个来继续。夫妻写书,琴瑟和弦,同时代的人,徐志摩和陆小曼曾共同创作过话剧《卞昆冈》;杨宪益、戴乃迭合译《离骚》成定情物。宋清如心底是存有这方面的想法的,既完成丈夫的遗愿,又能让彼此的精神魂魄流淌在莎士比亚的世界里不死。

干这件事的宋清如是有小小的野心的,为什么不能有呢?

1955年,宋清如向当时所在的单位杭州商校请了一年事假到四川,由朱生豪弟弟朱文振协助,潜心翻译朱生豪未完成的莎氏历史剧,共经过三年时间的翻译、整理、校勘,直至基本满意了,宋清如这才与出版社联系出版事宜,可得到的答复却是已落实全部翻译稿源,各篇目都各有其主了,不再需要她的译文了。对于这个结局,宋清如想必是遗憾的。

在那个年代,让人遗憾的事情实在太多。后来,在一次抄家中,宋清如的译稿尽毁。这让人不由想起,朱生豪在战争的硝烟中,生生地把译稿丢失了两次,这几乎要了他的命。书稿的丢失,对作家或译者的打击不能尽述,或许将导致一部作品的最终流产也未可知。

我们永远也看不到宋清如的莎士比亚译稿了。这不能不说是个遗憾。

重要的只是过程吧。她做了,又丢失了。她顺从命运的安排,没有重译。在这次翻译中,她恍惚回到了丈夫译莎时的岁月,晨昏蒙蒙,苦痛纠结,各种体味她不太与旁人交谈。她在杭师的同事钱旭洋回忆说,那时,宋清如总是最后一个睡觉,每天都搞到很晚,还抽烟,钱偶然发现原来宋在翻译莎士比亚,很震惊。

宋清如的职业是教师,学生偶尔从她对诗词的深情讲述中,领略一个诗人沛然的文才,但她从不在学生面前流露什么,当时的杭高学生骆寒超就不知自己的老师是位女诗人,直到后来,他才证实《现代》杂志上那位叫“清如”的,就是他的班主任。骆寒超在朱生豪、宋清如的诗集《秋风与萧萧叶的歌》序言中写道:

当施先生(施蛰存)向我们介绍了他办《现代》杂志的情况时,我插问了一句:“请问施先生,《现代》杂志常有诗发表的‘清如’,是不是姓宋,之江大学的?”

“怎么,你认识宋清如?”施先生腾地从古旧的圈椅里站了起来,眼直瞪着我好一会儿,接着有点自言自语地说了下去,“她到哪里去了呢?”

在听完骆寒超的介绍后,施蛰存沉吟起来:“宋清如真有诗才,可惜朱生豪要她不要发表新诗,她也就写都不写了。如果继续写下去,她不会比冰心差!”

在诗集序言中,骆寒超充分肯定了施蛰存的眼力,认为宋清如在诗感的敏锐、细腻及意象的快速摄取方面都有过人的天分。尤其是她的新诗如《有忆》、《夜半歌声》可以称得上是20世纪30年代新诗中的精品。

骆寒超甚至断言:就诗人素质和创作成就而言,清如先生都比生豪先生要略胜一筹。

一句“她不会比冰心差”,另一句“清如先生都比生豪先生要略胜一筹”,让人不由得生出许多感慨。

女子有才,因为各种原因,没有保养或维续自己的才华,不再写,或者是写得实在少了点,导致早年的才华也不被人所知。这样的例子并不少。

宋清如三十五岁之后忽然老了下去,原本清秀朝气的面容,黯淡生尘,有一种沧海茫茫之感。我看到的是宋清如1947年在秀州中学教书时的半身小照,原本婉转灵透的眼眸,水汽蒙上了她的眼。这距朱生豪辞世才三年,生活已经让她如此疲惫。

这期间,宋清如留存下来的诗词极少,除了《招魂》写于朱逝世一周年,其余的寥寥。而且,在以后的诗作中,对朱生豪的哀思几乎成了宋清如唯一的主题,爱人的离世、生活的窘迫几乎带走了她浩淼的诗情,唯留一清浅的小溪,在个人的心田上丁冬作响。

宋清如一生的创作高峰永远停留在施蛰存主编的《现代》杂志时期,《秋风与萧萧叶的歌》中收入她创作的十二首新诗,在表现形式、意象营造上都有自己的探索,骆寒超如此评价她的诗作:清如先生很快超越了新月诗派而向戴望舒一路的现代派靠近,口语的语调,自由体的形式,丰盈的意象及其有机组合中形成的意象象征抒情,都典型地显示了20世纪30年代现代诗派的格局。

看这首《夜半歌声》,可见宋清如在新诗诗体创新方面留下了独特的一页。

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在早期的诗作中,宋清如表现了新女性在外出求学、争取新生活道路方面艰难求索的心路历程,是那个时代新女性普遍拥有的生命体验,只是她的诗感又与众人不同,一词以概之:是俊逸(骆寒超语)吧。作为一个大学初年级的女生,宋清如成熟地展现了自己的创作风格,毫不逊色地归入那个年代优秀女诗人群中。

除了新诗,在朱生豪的影响及指点下,宋清如还作过不少旧体诗词。甚至在大学之后,宋与朱的书信来往还有诗文切磋,并自编诗集,可惜留世极少。

1977年,在外漂泊三十余年的宋清如回家了,回到嘉兴南门朱氏老宅,住在楼下北面偏屋,这一年她已经67岁了。

小屋的墙上挂着朱的炭画像,许多旧家具还是当年的,她睡的床就是朱生豪曾经睡过的。回忆是与时间、场地、心境相关的,老人爱回忆,一个人离开多年后再回到故事的发生地,也会轻易地被往事勾起涟漪。老年宋清如的回忆磕磕绊绊却又轻车熟路。

当更多的人阅读了朱译莎士比亚后,为其卓然的文风震撼不已,普遍认定其译笔在梁实秋之上。有心之人多方打听,终于获知朱的遗孀清如先生还住在嘉兴东米棚下朱氏老宅内。他们找到她,请她诉说故人往事,沉渣许久的往事在宋清如的心头泛起,她只是淡淡地,与每个到她小屋里来的人絮叨着,她的思路依然清晰。

宋清如这样回忆初次认识朱生豪的情景:“那时,他完全是个孩子。瘦长的个儿,苍白的脸,和善、天真,自得其乐地,很容易使人感到可亲可近。”

时间过去太久了,早年的经历——与朱生豪的十二年,往事点点,那些书信,她从来没有真正离开过它们,她所做的一切,她所有的忧虑、渴望,它们都处于共同的时辰,共同的风暴中。她没有别的时间可来对抗这浑厚的记忆。甚至到了晚年,她写纪念文章,与友人通信,这一切都因为他。

朱尚刚回忆说,老年的母亲把一切都看得很淡了,唯有父亲仍然是她心目中永远清晰的偶像,母亲在她最后一段生活道路上,把剩下不多的全部经历都用来塑造这个偶像了。

晚年的宋清如

朱尚刚提到了“偶像”和“塑造”这个词,偶像不能说话,偶像不能行走,偶像本身只是虚无,但偶像又是美的,晚年的宋清如把朱生豪当做了偶像?她在与来客的谈论中,怎么讲述朱生豪的一生?尽其所能美化他,还是只把他当成了一个相知甚深的亲人?

文人最终还是要从文字上找答案,除了译稿,诗稿,他们想到了朱写给宋的大量书信。宋清如犹豫了,这些信只是私人情感交流的产物,似乎没有公之于众的必要。她也不想把这份情感赤裸地展示于读者面前,这是他们这一辈人的顾虑。

面对是否出版的询问,她曾断然拒绝:“我不出版!……我打算在临死之前,把它们一把火统统烧掉!”

幸亏没有烧。但宋清如在编写《寄在信封里的灵魂》时,还是删除了一些属于私人感情的内容,在信件的数量上也有所保留。后来,朱尚刚在编写《朱生豪书信集》时则全盘收入不遗留。

1995年11月18日,是日风和日丽,白发苍苍的宋清如在秀州书店门口签名售书,读者眼中的她穿一件黑色粗布呢上装,眼神茫茫,曾经让朱生豪诗思泉涌的明眸,如今已如结了冰的湖面。

《寄在信封里的灵魂》收入的只是朱生豪的信。世人无法看到恋爱中女子的风度,只是一个寡言的男子在纸上絮絮叨叨。尽管我们多么希望看到两人的诗文酬唱,就像张兆和与沈从文间那绵长的情意,这是最大的遗憾。

我们不仅想认识恋爱中的宋清如,更想了解这个孤独的诗人在爱人遽逝后,如何在尘世中生活、爱与写作。我相信,宋清如一直在写,只是她的题材越来越小,小到只写一个朱生豪,一辈子都没有从朱的早逝中缓过神来。

有一个歌手曾以朱宋之间的故事自创歌曲《再见爱》,歌词感人,似概括了宋凄苦的后半生。“每当深夜寂寞压得我喘不过气/眼眶滚出那压抑的泪水/泪水慢慢迷蒙了双眼,怎么看不清我们的未来/我只看到你的心徘徊在门外,把我快乐的记忆/都化做尘埃……”

看宋遗留尘世的照片,我见识了岁月紧逼、美人迟暮。幼年、学生时代、新婚时光的宋,旗袍玲珑,圆脸朝气,身材曼妙,眼神流转。1947年的照片,秀州中学教书时的半身照,愁思悄然爬上明眸,朝气已消。直到晚年,已是彻底的老太容颜,服饰也变了,故事隐去,前后判若两人。

我喜欢穿着旗袍的宋清如,清秀娴静,意气风发,一切皆有可能。她属于那个时代,那个时代也将钟情于她。我能够想象老年宋清如身着旗袍在东米棚下简陋的小屋里,手捧外文书籍孜孜不倦地研读着。可这只是想象,时代所带来的改变,不仅止于服饰上。

但她有这样的风度。从宋遗留的一张诗稿中可见她的潇洒与豁达。

我愿意抖落浑身的尘埃

我愿意拔除斑斓的羽衣

我愿意抚平残余的梦痕

我愿意驱逐沉重的灵魂

没有叶没有根没有花朵

没有爱没有恨没有追求

能像轻烟一样无拘无束?

能像清风一样自由自在?

晚年的宋清如已掸净一身尘灰,时刻听从灵魂召唤,返还那仙乐飘飞、丝竹管弦的宴饮之地。

宋清如早年诗作《灯》中恰有这样两句:她苦念天上的仙乐/黎明时飞回了天空。

宋清如的手迹

1997年,宋清如聆听仙乐而去,与朱生豪分别整五十三年后,他们于天国团聚。因朱墓已毁于文革,所以她只能和《莎士比亚全集》、朱生豪的书信及那个装了他灵魂的信封一起下葬。这多像一首诗,两个诗人的灵魂在雨声里失眠或做梦,那境界是如何不同。

少年宋清如反抗家庭、时代加于女性身上的不自由,求学异地,早期有诗文才华显露,遇到朱生豪——这个注定要翻译莎士比亚的赢弱才子——是她一生的大事,他们相识、相爱,步入婚姻殿堂,虽然生活艰难,却琴瑟和美,相敬如宾,不想朱竟早逝,她孤独了一生,抚养孩子,出版遗稿,甚至亲自动手翻译莎剧,用自己的一生,维护了朱生豪的清白与尊严。

随着宋清如的离世,世上再没有人能深情讲述朱生豪的故事,如今他们俩的故事已合成一体,不再分开。再没有什么能把他们分开。

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